Beat the Heat

I'm sure you are thinking , WTF( what the flipping heck - I work in a school for heavens sake !) is she talking about, - it's freezing here?! Well, lucky me, I'm still sitting on a sunbed in Kefalonia , blithely hurtling towards the start of a new term , with no idea where all the school stuff  I smugly organised in early July , is. I know the school shirts were bought but I also know they were stuffed away, unlabelled and un ironed , I know not where. I failed to have the overpriced Blazer altered. She's going to have to walk round with her arms extended, like Frankenstein ! I also ignored , I now remember , the plaintive mews , in the run up to the hol , that she couldn't find her Lamy pen. 

Returning the day before school starts was not perhaps the wisest of ideas but this holiday was booked last minute, as my long suffering friends will attest. Never was there so much angst attached to going away, ridiculous given our much loved childhood holidays in caravans and B&Bs in Wales and Cornwall in our  trusty Morris Traveller. Once that was sufficient, now.... Honestly I despair of myself.... From the comfort of a sunbed, you understand, where I can afford such introspection. Like a diet, self realisation always starts tomorrow!!

Anyway, whilst in situ, I wanted to share what actually works in the sun, and what was a waste of baggage allowance . 

Starting from the top . My hat.

Fat Face £22

Invaluable. It has been squashed and dented by careless family members- just to see my Rumplestiltskin reaction I think- and it always pops back into shape. The big, black floppy Primark hat, although I love in the room, is a bit too theatrical and Good Housekeeping photoshoot  for ease. Have you ever seen anyone wearing one around the pool and thought, ' she looks a good laugh ', rather than snickering at her for being a poseur and secretly hoping it falls over her eyes so she trips in the baby pool?? Or is that just me?!! Anyway, the floppy hat is out next time.

Hair

Really recommend this Living Proof Leave In Conditioner from M&S £20 . Wait for their discount days to buy. This helps combat the inevitable straw hair fairy who arrives day 3 of the holiday.

Still on hair, if yours is curly, Aveda's 'Be Curly '£19.50 , curl enhancer, is great to define curls without frizz . There's no point blow drying if you have frizz prone hair. You will cool off in the shower, then spend half an hour in a moisture laden bathroom with a hairdryer which has less energy than a hand whisk, only to get all hot and sweaty again with hair like Crystal Tips. Step away from the dryer!!

The same is true of Make Up. Don't bother in the day. I don't care if it states that it's Waterproof Mascara- it isn't and by the time your face sun cream has sweated into your eye and those jolly 10 year olds have caught you in their crossfire in the pool, ( always English, always shouting ' Dad! Dad! ' ), you will look like Ursula the Sea Witch. If going commando, make up wise, is good enough forKate Winslet...alternatively, avoid mirrors!

Eyebrow Tinting

This is not a retraction on the no make up rule. It just helps it to work. No none wants to look like a boiled egg.its a good idea to get this done a day or two before you go away. If you live in the Leeds area, I recommend Lucy Lyttle and her lovely hand maidens at Be Beautiful in Farsley .Its a cruel fact that, as hair appears in faces - Freudian slip, I mean , places- you neither expected nor sought after, it disappears from areas where you truly mourn it's loss. Like the ends of your eyebrows. Tinting revives .

Face Sunscreen

It's only ever Garnier Spray Mist, self tan on my face. £8.49 at Boots.Reading so many articles and seeing the fabulous luminosity of Dr Julia Sevi at The Good Health Clininc or the Transylvanian Hannah Betts of The Times,has convinced me ( a bit late tbh) of the benefits of sunblock.

I still haven't found a sunscreen which , ultimately, doesn't make my eyes run but I've just purchased  some Factor 50 sunblock for the face from La Roche Posay and I live in hope.

If you do overdo the sun, I recommend Origins Drink Up intensive face mask . Brilliant .

Better than a foundation and a tinted moisturiser, try this Guerlain product. Just a lovely, healthy glow which smoothes imperfections .

Clothes for the evening

I have already posted these dresses on Instagram and can honestly say I feel I've got it right, temperature wise, this time. I only ever take dresses. Separates involve a waist band and that's a no no for me in the heat. Trousers or a skirt are a reminder that you've been back to that buffet once too often anyway.

I appreciate that they might not work for every holiday - this is a hotel and pool one- but they do work in more dress down, casual mode too. Just flats and less jewellery.

My beloved Hush dresses.

Daytime

I'm not going to attempt swim wear as our preferences are so specific. I will say that, each year, I waste space taking a tankini or swimsuit, and each year it goes back unworn. I think the British are the only nation to torture ourselves in body controlling ( blah blah ) miracle swimsuits. Forget them. They are hot and unnecessary . Look around the beach. Grandmas who erupt from the sea , like well fed seals ( and sometimes , walruses ) , are everywhere , caring nothing for their over abundance of flesh. Even the meanest of views, that brown flesh  looks better than white flesh, points to letting it all hang out. Those who try to cover up draw more attention to themselves. Wear that bikini. Ask yourself- if not now, then when?? 

A real confidence boost is a spray tan before you go. Again, Be Beautiful would sort you out with their , hilariously named, Sultana Tan . That's what I call it in my head anyway, it's something like that but, whatever the name, it's great. A really even tan without the stickiness or smell and it fades evenly whilst you are away. Spray tans are everywhere . If you're not sure , the safest bet is a St. Tropez.

Should you need to fill in the gaps on holiday, take some Cocoa Brown a self tan mitt. Get it from Superdrug.

If you  are looking for a good choice of swimwear ( please, go for the bikini ) try Freya or Fantasie or Panache . Fig leaves online has plenty to choose from and a brilliant sale on at the moment.

Day time Hero

Award goes to this sarong. When it's really hot, a piece of lightweight fabric is all you need. Perfect as a cover up for lunch when you can't face the idea of real clothes. Mine was €7 and worth every cent. Make sure it's not transparent, there are times when even knickers are too much cloth. I nearly lived, or died , to regret that though. As we drove over the mountainous centre of Kefalonia  yesterday , perilously close to the edge, all I could think of was , OMG I'm going to die with no pants on. What would my Granny say?!!

On the subject of knickers. You don't need that many . They wash and dry. Buy flesh coloured for maximumum versatility and I confess to buying M&S cotton mid rise briefs . Not Agent Provocateur by any means but just the job. Further in my defence, we are sharing the room with a bat eared14 year old. Enough said!

Essentially, dump all man made fibres and only have very loose sleeves.

That's me done for today. Did my usual trick of deleting it and starting again so it's taken up a bit too much holiday time . Slow learner me ! Happy September .